Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Sugar coating at work...

I work as a trainer and developer in my company and I basically keep teaching people about the corporate culture, soft skills, communication skills...etc, etc... to be precise, i teach them how to sugar coat on talks which actually means something else.

Some times I think, its mundane to always follow the rules inspite of knowing that the other person is already aware of whats up your mind actually.

A few mundane activities like, every time you write a mail, it starts with -

" Dear Sir (as if the person has been declared officially SIR by the Queen of England),"

"This is in regards/ reference to our conversation/ telecon/ previous mail...." (why do we always assume that the other person has a bad memory that you need to remind him/her of all the previous conversations, though that last conversation may be just a few minutes ago?)

There are a lot other examples. Also, being a part of HR, while recruiting people we say a few things which actually have a hidden meaning to it...here are a few. Hope they help you next time you join a company :)

Beware of these words -

"Competitive Salary" (We remain competitive by paying you less than our competition)
"Join our fast-paced company" (We have no time to train you)
“Casual work atmosphere" (We don't pay enough to expect that you will be able to formally dress up)
"Some overtime required" (you need to write letters to be connected with your family)
"Duties will vary" (Anyone in the office can boss you around)
"Must have an eye for detail" (We can’t afford a quality assurance dept. You have to do it yourself)
"Career-minded" (Female applicants must be childless - and remain that way)
"Apply in person" (If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told that the position has been filled)
"Seeking candidates with a wide variety of experience" (You'll need it to replace the three people who just quit)
"Requires team leadership skills" (You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect)
"Good communication skills" (Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it)



  1. corporate world se satayi hui abla naari... ;)

  2. corporate world se satayi hui abla naari... ;)...vivek...

  3. oh thats you vivek??? chalo good...:)

  4. LOL....

    So been teacher was better :)

  5. Nice tips.Can you share some tips on how to apply for a long leave to my manager.Also tips to convince my manager that I was sick the day before when I bunked office for no reason.

  6. Suvro,

    Well after returning from the sick day, you need to feel the weakness from within and make it show on your face that you are doing a favour to the boss by coming to the office...:) Dont talk much around and remain secluded and better not laugh loudly, otherwise the boss will think you are hail and hearty...hehe...

    Well to go for a long trip, you can either be truthful saying that you need a break from the routine so that when you return, your productivity increases...(i know the boss would hardly understand this) so instead you can take out a bahana of some close relative's death, which actually doesnt exist, for example, i talk about my chachi's death, who never exists (this way the guilt of talking about a death of your close one's doesnt bother you)...

    SO let me know if these tips worked for you...

    Happy holidays!!!

  7. Hmmm can be useful after I get a job! :D

  8. Dear Nikita

    That was pretty good. Though not from the corporate world, I realised how funny it is to keep referring about matters and conversations/discussions in correspondence or address every Tom, Dick and Harry as Sir. Fortunately "madam" that we refer to while addressing a woman is not mistaken for the madam belonging to the oldest profession.